Bridal Party - Bridesmaids

What is a bridesmaid?

Your bridesmaid is the person that you would like next to you as you take one of the most important steps in your life. She should be a close friend or family member of you or your groom. She is NOT your slave, pincushion or pseudo party planner.

What are the jobs of the bridesmaid?

- Helping to direct flow for the guests, in case there are stragglers
- Encouraging your guests to sign a guest book, if you choose to have one
- Assist you with various tasks, some of which may be unpleasant (think about it: have you figured out how you are going to use the bathroom in your dress?)
- Dance all the silly dances that the MC/DJ/Band play. Things like the ethnic dances,
Macarena, YMCA... well, you get the picture
- NOT to be your personal wedding coordinator
- NOT to yell at your vendors if you are unhappy
- NOT to be your photographer or videographer
- NOT to be the time keeper and keep everyone on schedule

How to select your bridesmaid's dresses?
- No matter what happens, the bride is always the most beautiful person in the room. There is no need to put your bridesmaids into an atrocious dresses that they have to pay for in the hopes of making them look worse, and you look better. Remember, these are people you love.

- Unless you have a cookie cutter bridal party, chances are your closest friends are not all the same shape, size and height. There are very few dress styles that can fit everyone. So, please do not try to stuff your plus sized or busty bridesmaid into a tight, strapless number that she will spend the rest of the evening pulling up. There are not enough Spanx in the world for that.

- Select a designer, a fabric and a color, then let your bridesmaids select dresses that fit them.

Selecting Your Wedding Colors

You have imagined your wedding since you were young. You envision the Tiffany Blue and chocolate brown adorning each corner of the reception area. Or your ivory and silver combination for invitations, flowers and napkins. And then you pick your venue... the banquet hall, country club, cultural facility or restaurant. You enter the room to be filled with your guests and find the red, green and brown floral pattern on the carpet, matched only by the stripes on the walls.

If you are choosing to select linens for the tables that are not the standard white, try to select a color to complement your venue. This may force you outside of your chosen colors. But Tiffany Blue on 20 table tops, with red/green/brown on the floor and walls?

Flowers

You have planned all the other details, now it is time for the centerpieces that will adorn your guests' tables. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

- Select flowers that are lovely, but only slightly fragrant. No one wants to come in to a reception hall and be hit with a fragrance similar to that of a freshly mopped floor.

- Your centerpieces should complement the rest of the room; they do not need to match exactly, but rather enhance the setting. This should include the colors on the walls, carpets, chairs, linen, etc.

- The height of your floral must not be intrusive on the table. Your guests should be able to talk over the centerpiece if it is short, or under it if it is tall.

- If you plan on using votive candles, please ensure that no part of your florals are within scorching distance. No one wants to use their water glass to put out a fire.

Favors, yes? or no?

In my house, I have a shelf that I have affectionately titled "the shelf where wedding favors go to die." It holds the various "aren't these cute" place card holders and other useless trinkets that I have received at weddings.

When planning your wedding, consider putting the $1 to $4.50 per piece funds towards something more important for your guests... like an open bar. As precious as you believe the "two peas in a pod" salt and pepper shaker sets are, they have very little practical use and will, more than likely, end up on the a hidden drawer or bottom shelf of a bookcase.

Unless you own stock in "personalizeyourownminiphotoalbums.com", just say no.